The Thunder Rolls

The Thunder Rolls

Three thirty in the morning
Not a soul in sight
The city’s lookin’ like a ghost town
On a moonless summer night
Raindrops on the windshield
There’s a storm movin’ in
He’s headin’ back from somewhere
That he never should have been
And the thunder rolls
And the thunder rolls

I can guarantee that we have all been touched by this in some way throughout our lives. Living a kinky lifestyle doesn’t exempt us from cheating or being cheated on. It usually happens when you least expect it, but there are always signs.

Pet and I have had several conversations regarding this topic as we both do our best to be transparent in our attraction to others. Neither of us are perfect and don’t claim to be, we try our best to be honest with each other even if it hurts.

The thunder rolls
And the lightnin’ strikes
Another love grows cold
On a sleepless night
As the storm blows on
Out of control
Deep in her heart
The thunder rolls

Pet has been through quite a bit lately with the passing of his father. It has taken a toll on his latest attraction to L. He backed off on communication with L and leaned on me for more support. I tried to be available to him as much as I could and show him the compassion and understanding he needed.

I was able to take a weekend and see pet a couple weeks ago, it was magical and so lovely. It was exactly what we both needed as we haven’t much time together this year. (more on that in another post..hehe) It solidified our relationship and we were able to be open and honest with one another. He admitted that things with L had slowed dramatically and that he didn’t think things would last. I admitted that I was not sad about it and it felt very selfish saying so. It was the truth though.

I thought I could share pet with someone and be totally fine with it as I have my relationship with S. That just isn’t how it works though, you can’t control what your heart says to your brain and mine was screaming, “No- this one is mine and I will not share with others!” It felt like the childhood equivalent to “get out of my sandbox”.

She’s waitin’ by the window
When he pulls into the drive
She rushes out to hold him
Thankful he’s alive
But on the wind and rain
A strange new perfume blows
And the lightnin’ flashes in her eyes
And he knows that she knows
And the thunder rolls
And the thunder rolls

My relationship with S is quite different than pet’s relationship with L. S is the father of our child and he was in the picture before pet. Pet has told me before that he is okay with this and it doesn’t bother him. I guess the question I have for myself is why can’t I be okay with sharing pet with L?

I think it stems from knowing pet so many years ago and knowing how vulnerable he can be in a new relationship. He has always worn his heart on his sleeve and he is quickly enthralled with others. I have never doubted his devotion to me though and I can only hope that he continues to trust me with his well-being. I may not be able to share him right now, but we never know what the future may hold.

The thunder rolls
And the lightnin’ strikes
Another love grows cold
On a sleepless night
As the storm blows on
Out of control
Deep in her heart
The thunder rolls

The Thunder Rolls- Garth Brooks

7 thoughts on “The Thunder Rolls

  1. That song…

    I always have a gut-reflex reaction to it; it makes me angry. Garth Brooks was a cheater. And he became popular when I was in high school, which was when I realized that – not once, but TWICE – my mother had married a cheater.

    Just… Ugh.

    .

    In other news…

    *laugh*

    Yeah, I get the whole “Wheeee!!!” NRE thing you see your partner go through. I have one who does that. I’ve gotten to the point now where I’m just like, “okay, whatever” when he starts off into Limerence Land. But there have been times in the past when it’s been pretty awful. So I get it.

    1. I understand the reaction, I think we all have a song or two that elicits that response.

      I like that- Limerance Land lol I never thought of it like that but it is quite true.

  2. Powerful song, even more powerful sharing.

    I have been on both sides of this.
    It isn’t easy. And when I was a cheater and confessed some confessions are never forgiven or relationship repaired.
    Thanks for sharing.

  3. I don’t know this song, but the lyrics are powerful. I knew Pet had a new love interest and that it was hard for you to bear, so I feel your relief … and your guilt about that.
    How wonderful that you got some time together and were able to relish it. On the downside though, I’m dorry to hear about the passing of Pet’s father, it probably did hasten that new relationship’s end. It probably felt very trivial in the great scheme, where as the longevity of yours must have felt like safe haven.
    I don’t pretend to understand being poly but I am glad you guys are maintaining honest communication – it feels very necessary for a strong bond IMO.
    Great to catch up with you xoxo

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