This is my second TMI Tuesday. I’ve missed a few in the shuffle.
1. What curse word do you use the most?
I’m a f*cking equal opportunity sh*t poster, god%*#%! I like to use them all, especially when dealing with a55holes, because let’s face it: I’m more b*tch than b**tard.
2. Would you rather take a picture or be in a picture?
Definitely taking, because most people I run into can’t compose a good picture to save their lives.
3. Has anyone ever called you lazy? Why did they say that?
Many times, but only by people who don’t work with me, and only because they have no idea what my job actually is.
See, I’m a government worker, and the guiding philosophy behind government work–or any work where attention to detail is vital, such as anything in insurance–is to slow down, use your time, and make damn sure you get it right the first time. Because, nothing wastes time like needing to do it all over again because Joe Newhire thinks he can do it faster.
You don’t get bonus points for being early, so take your time, make your deadlines, and minimize your stress. It’s a marathon not a sprint. That thirty year clerk over there working at a snail’s pace can probably do more in less time than the twenty something coming in from the private sector, simply because she is thorough. The best bureaucrats I’ve ever worked with come in from the insurance industry.
So, yes, I get called lazy. A lot. No one complains though when service failure rates drop through the floor because I took the time to turn through that moldy tome of tables and charts to find the right way, or took the extra few seconds per piece to pay attention to names and dates.
4. Have you ever dated or slept with a neighbor? How did things turn out?
5. Have you ever broken up with a significant other then “cheated” with that same person while they were in a relationship with someone else?
Am I the kind of guy who sleeps where he shits? I’d say certainly not. Infidelity is bad enough. Retroactive infidelity is infidelity squared. Forgive this analogy, but unfortunately it fits: You remember that kid who only ever wanted to play with someone else’s toys? You know who I’m talking about, this kid could have the exact same toy but wanted yours because it wasn’t his. That’s who grows up to do this kind of crap. That isn’t me.
Bonus: Tell us something good.
It’s not too late to kick back, sip some good bourbon, and listen to Elvis.